The Unchurched Do Not Hate You, Christian

“What’s church?”

That’s one question my kids weren’t used to hearing. But one morning, a boy who lived down the street knocked on the front door to play with our sons. Because it was a Sunday, our young neighbor was informed that they’d have to take a rain check because they were headed to church.

Not long before this event, our family had arrived in Denver to start a church. We were surprised at how little common knowledge about Christians could be found on our street.

It won’t be long before streets all over America—even in the Bible Belt—are filled with children who don’t know “church.” Their parents have never taken them to a worship service or even mentioned the word.

While this reality is frightening for us as Christians, it’s also a wake-up call for relationship evangelism. The outward-focused church will have an enormous opportunity to reach the non-religious—and religious, for that matter—in the season to come.

79% of unchurched people agree with this statement: “If a friend of mine really values their faith, I don’t mind them talking about it.” 

The idea of traditionally faith-friendly contexts becoming post-Christian seems daunting, but there’s some encouragement. According to Lifeway Research, 79% of unchurched people agree with this statement: “If a friend of mine really values their faith, I don’t mind them talking about it.”

In order to grow in the future, local churches must foster a “here-for-the-community” mentality. As we adapt our ministries to reach the post-Christian people of America, here are four groups to consider:

The Searching Skeptic

While some unbelieving people are staunchly against all organized religion, many of them are not. Because God “has placed eternity in the hearts of people” (Ecclesiastes 3:11), human beings cannot but crave an encounter with God. As C.S. Lewis remarked: “If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.”Pastors and church leaders must continue to model an effort for building relationships with those who are searching for God—and having a hard time finding Him.

In planting our church in post-Christian Denver, we discovered that there were scores of people in the community who were still exploring the concept of faith, but were confused by the multitude of messages coming through their devices and TVs.

Like the Ethiopian eunuch in Acts 8, they needed help de-coding the message of the Bible and understanding how it could be reconciled with today’s strong headlines from people deemed experts.

Reaching soft-hearted skeptics is the most enjoyable aspect of ministry. Pastors and church leaders must continue to model an effort for building relationships with those who are searching for God—and having a hard time finding Him.

The Religion Runaway

Unfortunately, “de-churched” is a real term. Many people have a wounded-by-the-church story that prevents them from darkening the doors of another one. It seems as though the only way to get them into the sanctuary is to put someone they love on stage. People will go to great lengths to show loyalty to their loved ones.

At our church in Denver, we discovered that children’s ministry was by far the most effective way to reach this group. Following our kids’ camp (our term for VBS), we would train the kids to sing a song in “the big room” and invite their family to come and see. Our communities are filled with church dropouts—people who used to engage regularly but have gotten out of the habit or given up on God for various reasons.

These Sundays may not have been our highest overall attendance days, but I do believe we had more unchurched people in the room than ever—including Easter.

According to Lifeway Research, our communities are filled with church dropouts—people who used to engage regularly but have gotten out of the habit or given up on God for various reasons. It will take wisdom and strategy to reach these types in future, and kids’ ministry is one of the most winsome ways to interact with them.

The Cultural Christian

The task before the church isn’t just to reach the unchurched. There are people sitting within an earshot of our ministries who haven’t been captivated by the gospel.There are people sitting within an earshot of our ministries who haven’t been captivated by the gospel.

While this type is harder to find in the Northeast and Western portions of America, the South continues to experience the veneer of Christianity which Paul described as “having a form of godliness but denying its power” (2 Timothy 3:5).

A work of God must happen in a person’s heart before they can see the kingdom of God that is at hand. Until then, religious games are readily available and always easy to substitute.

You and I have been put on planet earth for such a time as this. Let’s steward our ministries and our preaching in a way that opens our doors wide to a post-Christian America.

Ben Mandrell

Published by Intentional Faith

Devoted to a Faith that Thinks

One thought on “The Unchurched Do Not Hate You, Christian

  1. It’s been my experience that they’re perfectly fine with your faith until you speak openly about what it says about their favorite sin set. Not too long ago, I got into a conversation with an atheistic colleague about God. She told me that she can’t believe in a deity who is judgmental. The more we talked, the more I realized that there was something deeply disturbing to her.

    After a bit of digging, it came out. She doesn’t like the biblical position on homosexuality. She’s one of those “love is love” types, and what the Bible says about homosexuality bothers her. Any question of how she was interpreting Scripture went out the window when she said something to the effect of, “So, for homosexuals to be right with God, they either have to marry someone of the opposite sex or remain celebate?” I was surprised that she understood it, but said, “Yeah, that’s about it.” She ended the conversation with, “I can’t get behind that.”

    The fact is that the Gospel is the most offensive message in history, hands down. It’s convicting, uncompromising, straight, and narrow. There’s no getting around, under, or through it unchanged, and they hate that. They hate it because they love Sin. If they can get by with viewing the Gospel through the lens of relativism, then they’re good with being tolerant because the Gospel is no better than any other religious message and can be disregarded at will.

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