Curating a Life in Christ
We all can be stubborn at times. There are areas of disagreement in our marriages where we want our way. These can be as simple as a restaurant choice or what we are going to watch on television. A sign of love is the ability to yield when it can demonstrate affection and attention.
Choose one of those disagreements between you and your spouse and willingly let them have their way. In fact, offer to do it their way before the argument starts. Tell them you are putting their preference first.
Philippians 2:4 (MSG)
4 Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.
Philippians 2:5 (NLT)
5 You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.
James 3:17 (MSG)
17 Real wisdom, God’s wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced.
We don’t talk about it often but we need to remember those who are victims of crime. Theirs is a personal violation. We should also pray for the criminal. Here are some scriptures to lift in prayer.
Romans 13:1-5 (NLT)
1 Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God.
2 So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished.
3 For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you.
4 The authorities are God’s servants, sent for your good. But if you are doing wrong, of course you should be afraid, for they have the power to punish you. They are God’s servants, sent for the very purpose of punishing those who do what is wrong.
5 So you must submit to them, not only to avoid punishment, but also to keep a clear conscience.
Luke 10:32-37 (NLT)
32 A Temple assistant walked over and looked at him lying there, but he also passed by on the other side.
33 “Then a despised Samaritan came along, and when he saw the man, he felt compassion for him.
34 Going over to him, the Samaritan soothed his wounds with olive oil and wine and bandaged them. Then he put the man on his own donkey and took him to an inn, where he took care of him.
35 The next day he handed the innkeeper two silver coins, telling him, ‘Take care of this man. If his bill runs higher than this, I’ll pay you the next time I’m here.’
36 “Now which of these three would you say was a neighbor to the man who was attacked by bandits?” Jesus asked.
37 The man replied, “The one who showed him mercy.” Then Jesus said, “Yes, now go and do the same.”
Luke 23:39-43 (NLT)
39 One of the criminals hanging beside him scoffed, “So you’re the Messiah, are you? Prove it by saving yourself—and us, too, while you’re at it!”
40 But the other criminal protested, “Don’t you fear God even when you have been sentenced to die?
41 We deserve to die for our crimes, but this man hasn’t done anything wrong.”
42 Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom.”
43 And Jesus replied, “I assure you, today you will be with me in paradise.”
Ephesians 4:28 (NLT)
28 If you are a thief, quit stealing. Instead, use your hands for good hard work, and then give generously to others in need.
Imagine you have a damaged car and a damaged hand. Damage is sever to both. Will you treat both the same? Will you get rid of your hand as easily as you would your car? Certainly not because our hand is attached to us. It is part of us. The same is true of our spouse. We need to elevate the level of importance they have to our lives. They are not exchangeable.
Do something today that will reflect how important they are to your life. This is more than just another errand or gift. Think of how much they mean to you and be creative is expressing that dependence. Here is a great time for a lovely card or personal note.
Ephesians 5:31 — For this cause will a man go away from his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.
Ephesians 5:33 — But do you, everyone, have love for his wife, even as for himself; and let the wife see that she has respect for her husband.
Genesis 2:21-24 — And the Lord God sent a deep sleep on the man, and took one of the bones from his side while he was sleeping, joining up the flesh again in its place: 22 And the bone which the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman, and took her to the man. 23 And the man said, This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh: let her name be Woman because she was taken out of Man. 24 For this cause will a man go away from his father and his mother and be joined to his wife; and they will be one flesh.
Matthew 19:5 — For this cause will a man go away from his father and mother, and be joined to his wife; and the two will become one flesh?
The love dare series will be shared on the weekdays to help everyone keep on schedule. Simply rehearse the weekly activities over the weekend.
One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people can be. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "It was great, Dad." "Did you see how poor people can be?" the father asked.
"Oh Yeah" said the son. "So what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.
The son answered, "I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."
With this the boy’s father was speechless. Then his son added, "Thanks dad for showing me how poor we are."
When we feel distant from God — and most of us go through it at some time! — sometimes we wait, and wonder why God doesn’t seem close. At times, it is because we need to make the first move back toward God.
James 4:8 (NRSV) Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
Note: Our drawing near precedes His.
And we are to go to our local churches, to listen, to learn from His word. That is a part of the process.
Eccl 5:1 (NIV) Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. Go near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools, who do not know that they do wrong.
Note that the words "draw" and "Go," are action-oriented. They require us to initiate action.
Also we need to keep praying during the dry times.
Psa 6:3-4 (NIV) My soul is in anguish. How long, O LORD, how long? 4 Turn, O LORD, and deliver me; save me because of your unfailing love.
The Psalmist earnestly seeks out God. He pours out his feelings to Him.I have found that if I keep doing the things I should — prayer, worship, Bible study — even when I don’t feel like it, the closeness to God returns. But I have to do my part. I can’t sit back and wait for God to act.
Dear Lord help us to do our part in seeking You out. Draw near to those who feel distant from You. Help them to truly understand the love You have for them. In Jesus’ name amen.
Do something special and out of the ordinary for your spouse. Something you would not normally do or they would expect like wash her car or clean the kitchen. Maybe you make his favorite dessert or watch that sporting event with him. Do something that will say that they are special to you not for what they do for you but for being themselves.
Continue to control the negatives and give positives. Keep up the meeting and leaving attentions. You are one-fourth of the way along this path. Make a note of what you have discovered so far.
Romans 5:8 (NLT)
8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
1 John 4:10 (NLT)
10 This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.
1 Corinthians 13:7 (NIV)
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Romans 8:24 (NIV)
24 For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has?
“A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.” Proverbs 14:29
One of my all-time favorite school teacher stories is about a kindergarten teacher who at the end of an exasperating day had to put boots on all 31 of her students before she sent them out in the snow. As she struggled to lace up the last boot on the foot of the 31st student, the child looked at her and said, “These aren’t my boots.” Thinking that she would have to go back and re-boot the whole class, she furiously ripped off the boots only to hear the kindergartener say, “They’re my sister’s boots, but my mom let me wear them today.”
Does life ever try your patience? Of course it does. There is just something about being born on this planet that makes us vulnerable to snap, often destructive, responses to life’s inevitable stress.
What is it that pushes you to the edge? Is it that guy who keeps cutting you off in heavy traffic or your daughter who keeps snapping her bubble gum every 10 seconds? It’s different for all of us, but we’ve all experienced that temptation to explode when somebody or something stomps on our frayed nerves.
I hate to up the pressure, but it’s in moments of near-nuclear explosions that we find out how closely we’re walking with the Lord. Galatians 5:22 says, “And the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience.” When life takes us to the edge, it’s easy to tell if we are being controlled by the Holy Spirit, or whether our old nature is going to step up to manage the situation.
Being patient doesn’t mean that we morph into milk-toast people for Jesus, with no fire in our belly. But the kind of patience that the Spirit wishes to produce does bring restraint to our anger. Anger always clouds good judgment while patience helps us stand back and evaluate the tension in a constructive way. As our text says, “A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.”
Patience says “no” to our “gut reaction” to do the first thing that comes to mind. When your gut reaction is: “I’m quitting this job right now!” patience says, “Why don’t you give it a few days and pray about it. Think about how this will affect your future and your family.” Patience gives you the space you need to make better decisions. An impulsive “I’m heading to the dealership right now to buy that new car!” may need patience to slow you down long enough to ask yourself, “What’s wrong with the car I have? Is there anything better that God would want me to do with the money?”
And, patience may just get your anxious little self out of the way so that God can accomplish what He has in mind through the trial that has you so frazzled. The psalmist helps us when he says, “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord” (Psalm 27:13-14 NASB).
And Isaiah assures us that “those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary” (Isaiah 40:31 NASB).
So all together now: Let’s take a deep breath, step back, and patiently wait for Him to manage your response. No wonder patience is called a virtue!
YOUR JOURNEY…